There’s a lot of talk about self-care and self-love. This is an important discussion. If you don’t look after yourself, you won’t be able to help yourself or others. Methods and tools for looking after ourselves can help us reduce anxiety and stress, increase energy and feel happier. But we can improve our well-being by connecting and caring about others too. With all the chaos and fear in the world, it’s not only valuable to us but to society to look beyond ourselves. In a time where self-care is a high priority, have we become so self-obsessed that we have forgotten to think about other people too? Have we become overly inward focused at the expense of any outward focus?

 

Prioritising self-care and self-compassion has been a game-changer for me. Working full-time and raising young kids, I found myself regularly feeling overwhelmed and burnt out. I’ve learnt how to listen and respond to how my body feels, engage in joyful activities, practice gratitude and simply accept that I’m not a superwoman. It’s helped me to reduce my stress and feel more content in my life.

 

I also notice that I feel good when I care for other people. Here is a simple example. I had to run an errand and went on a short walk to the post office. I was agitated after a morning of trying to fix my broken website. On my walk, I crossed paths with the postman in his postman buggy. I moved to the side to let him pass and he looked at me, smiled and gave me a cheery “thank you”. It was a genuine thank you and I replied “no problem”. He waved at me as he rode past. Such a simple gesture but it was amazing to feel my agitation shift. A kind exchange was all that was needed to lift my spirits and I went on my way. The positive effect of that genuine but simple interaction was tangible. It reminded me of the inherent relationship we have with each other.

 

Our pace of life is fast, and there are so many expectations placed on us. We are fortunate to have technology that allows us to be connected, yet so many people feel lonely. At the end of the day, many of us are searching for happiness or at least to feel at peace with who we are and our place in the world. Self-care and self-compassion are good for our well-being. But caring for others makes us feel good too.  And it improves the well-being of the receiver. The effect of self-care and kindness towards others is we feel twice as good and we have a positive impact on the world. 

 

Acts of kindness are good for us and it’s backed up by science. When we genuinely care for those around us we release serotonin and dopamine- a natural mood stabiliser that controls wellbeing and happiness and oxytocin - tied to making us more trusting, more generous, and friendlier, while also lowering our blood pressure.  Kindness also reduces stress, anxiety and prevents illness. It means that Mother Nature has hard-wired us for caring and that we feel good when we are altruistic and empathetic toward others

 

The best part is, kindness not only makes the giver and receiver feel good, but it’s contagious. Kindness causes a positive ripple effect becoming a force for good. A study in Scientific American found people “not only imitate the act of kindness but the spirit underlying it”. In other words, people can not only imitate acts of kindness but also find new ways to show it. It means that someone who can’t afford to donate to a charity can show kindness in new ways. This behavior can help spread positivity much further. Genuine care begets genuine care and right now, infectious kindness is something we can all afford to catch. We are all connected so it makes sense that we feel better by strengthening the whole.

 

For each of you reading this, here is a gentle reminder that we need to care for both ourselves and others to feel true well-being. How that looks for each person is different and it is our work to truly listen to what we need at each moment in time. 

 

For wellness businesses, if we really care about people’s well-being we need to think holistically. It’s not enough to spruik self-care alone. If we really want to create an impact we need to “walk the walk” and create ethical businesses that embody kindness and promote care for self and the world. 

 

Ambarya is returning to the idea that we are all part of something bigger. By caring for ourselves and each other, we feel at peace and have a positive impact on the world.  Our mala beads are ethically handmade using natural gemstones, bringing connection and energy to our heart’s intentions. We care for others by ensuring fair living wages for traditional makers and helping to empower underserved communities. At a time when we have so much available to us, there is still so much inequality and, we still seem to search of ways to feel better. We suggest that by approaching life with compassion and kindness for all, we might find the healing we are after.

Sources of information

What is Self-Care and Why is it Important For You? 

What Is Self-Care and Why Is It Critical for Your Health? | Everyday Health

The art of kindness - Mayo Clinic Health System 

The Science of Kindness | Cedars-Sinai

Being Nice Can Change Your Brain | Psychology Today Australia 

The Science Behind Kindness and How It Benefits Your Health | University Hospitals

Kindness Contagion - Scientific American

Kindness Makes You Happy… and Happiness Makes You Kind.